• Mon. Jun 5th, 2023

Janeane's World

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Raising the Bar in Relationships to Have a Happier Life

If you want to have a happier life, work at raising the bar in relationships. No matter how good your relationships are, you should always strive to make them better.

Happy older African American couple and the words "Raising the Bar in Relationships to Have a Happier Life"

Previously, this space has been used to look at raising the bar as an entrepreneur and raising the bar with continuing education.  In future articles, we will be looking at raising the bar with improved discipline at home and work and performance on the job.

This week we will look at raising the bar in personal and professional relationships. Human beings are social creatures. There is something built into us from creation that gives us a strong desire to be in community with other human beings. In order to be a successful member of a  community whether at home or at work you need to be a good person, a person people want to be around.

We have all heard stories about people who have great reputations at work, but come home and treat their family members like dirt. We have also heard stories about people who are wonderful at home but treat everyone like dirt at work because they don’t like the job. It is understandable that a person would act like a good person at work. That may be crucial in order to maintain continued employment. It is understandable a person who acts like a good person at home because home is where the heart and the loved ones can be found.

It is important to raise the bar on your behavior at home and at work. Everyone knows the expression misery loves company. However, no one wants to be that company. People do like to be around pleasant people, people who make them good about themselves and life in general. So here are some tips for being a person people want to be around.

At home, start the day by being nice to everyone in the house. Save all the complaints about missed chores and home-related problems for the end of the day. Don’t complain about towels left on the floor after the shower.    This means that everyone in your house will start the day off better.

Think about it, how much better could your kids do at school if you sent them off smiling and happy with no negative talk. In the morning, instead of complaining that your husband didn’t get finished everything on his “honey-do list,” imagine how he would feel if you sent him off to work with a little afternoon delight in the morning.

When you get to work, how do you think your co-workers would react if you came in each day with a smile and a hearty “Hey everyone, make it a good one!” What if you also brought in some cookies, or a few pieces of fruit to share with your co-workers? After a few weeks, your reputation with your co-workers would change and people would start to think of you as an upbeat, happy person.

At home how would your family react if instead of complaining about the chores your family members didn’t do, you started doing the chore? After you start, call the person responsible to help you with the chore? Once the person comes in and gets started, you could say, “Ooops, I just remembered, this is your chore. I didn’t mean to take over, you go ahead and finish.” Think about the reaction you would get to that approach, compared to yelling, “Get in here and do your chores you lazy bum.”

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At work, when there is an assignment to be done, that must be done but it is unpleasant, raise the bar by raising your attitude. Imagine how your co-workers would react if at the start of each job no one wanted to do you said, “Hey, no one wants to do this job, it stinks, let’s get together and get it done so we can get paid next Friday and move on to the next task.”

The Bible says a merry heart “does good like a medicine.” Those words were true 2,000 years ago and they are true today. Good attitudes, good feelings, good vibes are contagious. If you raise the bar and improve your attitude at home and at work, you may just find that your relationships at home and at work improve. 

No matter how long you have been a sour puss at home and in the workplace, you can raise the bar. You can have better behavior, you can be the kind of person people want to be around. So the question for you this terrific day what are your tips for being a better person?