It is thrilling to know that it is possible to accept compliments with dignity and grace. Recently, over the course of two days, I gave four different entrepreneurs compliments about how they were operating their businesses and great ideas they had for business ventures. Each of these women failed to accept the compliment. Instead, to a woman, each downplayed her accomplishment or pointed out ways things could be better. This made me sad. These were wonderful, accomplished, successful women who deserved the compliments I gave them. Each one behaved as if she did not deserve the compliments and kind words.
Here are five reasons failing to accept compliments with dignity and grace is a bad thing:
1. It is an insult to the compliment giver – if I give you a compliment and you refuse to accept it, you insult me and give the message that I do lack intelligence. If I give you a compliment you tell me you do not deserve, you are telling me I am not smart enough to know what the situation actually is.
2. You damage your reputation – when you do not know how to accept compliments, you build a reputation as a person who does not know her place in the universe. It appears that there is something wrong with you if you push away compliments or point out your faults when complimented.
3. Damage is done to your self-esteem – when you deny a compliment or point out your faults when complimented you insult yourself. Over the course of time, these self-inflicted attacks on your self-esteem cause damage.
4. Blessings are blocked – the church girl in me is reminded that if God can use rocks to convey his message, He can use peers and customers to give the message that you are great at something. If you continue to refute or counter compliments, this avenue of giving you a blessing will be taken away.
5. It is irritating – the thing I felt most when those entrepreneurs refused to accept the compliments I gave them was an irritation. I was complimenting them, letting them know that what they did mattered and was important. When they did not accept the compliments and instead tried to downplay the accomplishments it made me not want to go through the effort of complimenting them again.
Here are the three reasons you should begin to accept compliments with dignity and grace:
1. It is good to receive – as an entrepreneur, you deal with complaints from employees and customers. Entrepreneurs also spend a lot of time giving to others – time, resources and materials. It is a nice change to be able to simply accept the sweet joy of kind words.
2. The day is improved – some days an entrepreneur has troubles and spends the day putting one fire after another. Those days, which can occur often when you are managing your own empire are bad days. On those days, a compliment, a reminder of something good you have done makes the day better.
3. Good needs to be celebrated – while you may not do a good job simply to be complimented, good deeds, good actions, and good results deserve to be complimented. Of course we mourn when things are bad, it is the right thing to do. When you do good, accept the compliment and enjoy the sweet satisfaction of a job well done, it is the right thing to do.
Here are 5 tips to get you started:
1. Remember, charity starts at home – the Golden Rule says treat others how you want to be treated. When you compliment others, you want the recipient of your kind words to accept them and feel good about receiving them. Practice having that type of attitude yourself.
2. Use affirmations – remind yourself throughout the day that you are worthy of good things, that you were created in the image of greatness which means there is greatness inside you. Get a few affirmations, statements that make you feel good, that encourage you. This will help you to believe you deserve good words. Once you realize you deserve good words you will find it easier to accept them from others.
3. Vision board – create a vision board, either electronically or with the old glue and magazine trick. The vision board should emphasize good qualities, accomplishments and good ideas. When you can visualize and work towards good things, you will be able to accept compliments with dignity and grace.
4. Use your mirror – look in your mirror and tell yourself that you are good, that you can do good things with your business. When you can look yourself in the eyes and believe good things, you will be able to accept compliments from others
5. Greeting cards put it in writing – stop by your local drug store and read the greeting cards. Pay careful attention to the ones for thanks and congratulations. These cards will be full of compliments and praise. Read them, they will encourage you and condition you to hear good things.
Another cool way to start accepting compliments with dignity and grace is to start giving them to others. Start with your spouse, friends, and co-workers. Make an effort to give out five or more compliments per day. Once you have developed a habit of giving compliments to others and seeing the good it does to those who receive them, you will be more likely to want and appreciate compliments you receive from others. Start a compliment journal. Keep track of compliments you receive from others and look back at the journal pages on a regular basis. Seeing past compliments on a regular basis will condition you to the fact that you do good things and deserve the compliments you receive. When you receive a compliment, there is no deep, complex thing you need to do. Listen to the complimentary words and simply say “thank you.” No more is necessary, simply say “thank you.”
As an entrepreneur, if you are going to be successful, you will receive compliments on a regular basis. You will work hard, you will work smart and you will deserve the compliments. Learn to accept them with grace and dignity because it is good for your bottom line. After all, compliments mean you are doing things well and entrepreneurs who do things well earn more money. The more successful you are, the more money you will earn, the more compliments you will receive. Since the compliments will come, you must learn to accept them with dignity and grace.
In conclusion, it is thrilling to know that it is possible to accept compliments with grace. So, the question for you this thrilling day is, what is stopping you from accepting compliments with dignity and grace?
If you are having trouble creating the confidence you need to succeed, check out my book, “Creating Confidence Begins and Ends in Your Mind” to learn all you need to learn!